Wait...I Can't Do That Either!
“Having hit a wall, the next logical step is not to bang our heads against it.”
While so many of us are at home doing our part to keep a massive public health hazard from getting worse, we’re all confronting new issues we’ve never seen before. The challenges of this time are many, and for some of us, truly overwhelming—the financial challenges of not working, or the time crunches of having to work and suddenly take care of children at the same time, the need to find new ways to connect with family and friends to stave off loneliness, changes in diet depending on what’s stocked at the grocery store, the shock of such rapid change, and a general sense of fear and uncertainty around how much worse all of this might get. Yet this time is not without solace either, as suddenly we spend less time commuting and with the usual busy-ness we’ve grown accustomed to, and many of those we love have a bit more time to connect. Relationships are being rekindled. There are cultural offerings we have access to that can bring some unusual pleasures to our lives. There may be more time for rest and reflection, or for health and wellness and fitness activities, as well as novel educational activities, if we can find the will to use it productively.
While I don’t know your situation, I do have some ideas for you that may support your balance right now, so here goes:
Extend patience to yourself and others now to the very best of your ability. Everyone is dealing with whiplash born of circumstances that have had no parallel in our lifetimes. We’re all giving up freedoms we’ve previously taken for granted because they were so commonplace, and it’s uncomfortable, perhaps in the extreme. Everyone responds differently, but it’s completely normal during such times to have ups and downs that defy logic and require flexibility as we figure out how to cope.
Everyone you know could use a check-in and a kind word from you, and even better, some time during which you consciously listen to how they’re doing, for good or ill. Human contact is incredibly important for everyone sanity, and it’s a gift that having more time on your hands may enable you to give more easily at this time.
Before you mindlessly plunk yourself down to binge watch another series, take time often to actually think about how you’d like to be spending your time. There’s nothing wrong with filling some of your time with entertainment, but maybe there are projects you never normally have time for that now would be the perfect time to tackle. What’s been dragging at you that you might like to fix? Is there something you’ve been wanting to learn? A closet you want to clear out? There’s no need to go overboard with these projects, but you might find that moving some of them forward is fulfilling, and something you’ll be grateful for when you’re back out in the world. Make sure you make room for things of this nature if you want to accomplish them.
Constantly confronting limitations can be frustrating and exhausting. When you have a bad day, give yourself some space to come around. When we drive ourselves too hard, parts of us rebel, and it can be actually more efficient to allow ourselves to breathe rather than doubling down on cracking the whip.
Renewal looks different to everyone. Introverts might be in heaven now with all the staying home, but extroverts may be struggling without constant socializing. Whatever would make this time feel well spent to you, try to sneak some of that into every day so that you’re sustaining yourself with high-yield activities that really do the trick for you and your needs. This is a great time to learn more about what really makes you happy, even if some of things can’t happen right now.
For instance, love travel? Spend some time researching places you’ve always wanted to go. Then when you’re finally free to take your next trip, you’ll know exactly what you want. Same for anything else you’d like to do, but that requires research.
Institute some sort of practice that helps you stay sane, whether that’s meditation or prayer, physical activity undertaken mindfully, art projects or other creative endeavors, journaling, spiritual meet-ups, or Tapping.
If you find yourself floundering, remember that there’s a lot of help available to you, both through people you know who are stuck at home and through organizations that are continuing to function. You’re not alone, though it can feel like that. Make sure you reach out for help if you need it.
We may be feeling pretty pent up, thwarted and stuck right now, and that’s pretty normal in the current circumstances, but there are opportunities here as well. We can’t control world events, but we do have at least some choice in how we handle ourselves within them. With some thought, you may find any number of ideas to perk up your daily experience until we’ve all come out the other side and can resume a more normal slate of activities.